Through the fire, to the limit - Chaka Khan
random knowledge of the day:Do you know what the term 'kitty' (as in the pot in card games like Bid Whist) comes from? I didn't until today when I read Ray Charles' explanation of it in Q: An Autobiography of Quincy Jones. Six-nine aka RC aka Mr. Charles writes...
...sometimes we'd work at clubs for the kitty, which was tips that people would throw into a tin can or wooden box shaped like a cat's face with its mouth wide open and a light inside.
who knew? Nobody could every explain that to me when i was being taught Bid Whist as a kid...now I know.
random word of the weekend: supple
random saturday: My sister came over and we did mad cleaning. Top to bottom. Moved furniture. Steam cleaned carpets. I have pictures of before and after but i don't think I'll post them until we actually move in my new (well, new to me with cool Trading Spaces style slip covers courtesy of Moms) couches. We then had dinner with Courtney and saw eight legged freaks which was surprisingly good. No brain food here but if you want to laugh, jump out your seat and feel like spiders are crawling all over you...peep this one. Been a long time since I jumped in a movie theater (not since the first Jurassic Park I don't think) but I did in this one. Courtney got to see the crazy one in action and she wasn't even that crazy. A very good day.
random allowance: If you see me on the street and I happen to say dig and mad or cats and kittens and possibly change the paradiggum too much just tell me to shut up and find new words. Go on...you're allowed.
random event of the week: This Friday Night, the Temple Bar in Santa Monica. 3 bands, 2 of whom I love (The Soul of John Black and Medusa and Feline Science), 10 bucks. Its Funk, Its hip hop, its a hot joint, its where the sexy people hang out. You know you wanna be there. I'll be there. Come be with me. I'll probably roll in there about 8:30/9.
I feel like I've forgotten something but its late...just go read the finale of Lyndsay Star. Pts. 1 and 2 in case you missed them.
Lyndsay stood just inside the entry way of The Karma Garden and took a deep breath. Her body was tense and she was on edge. It seemed odd to her to feel this tense entering a place meant to instill calmness and relaxation. The incense was burning, the soft sounds of smooth jazz interpretations of world beat played lowly through the speakers and the smells of every tea imaginable filled her nose. Well, not every tea. The Karma Garden was famous in part because it was the only tea/coffee shop in Los Angeles that didn't serve an array of Chai drinks. The shop's slogan delighted in this fact - Bad Chai, Good Chi! It was upsetting to Lyn actually, she could really go for a nice Chai Tea Latte at that moment.
Kerrigan pushed through the door, bumped into Lyn and dropped her purse, the contents of which spilled onto the floor. Lyn made no move to help Keri get her things. Instead she put her hands on her hips and shook her head.
"What's the matter with you?" Lyn asked.
"What do you mean?" Keri said, without looking up. She quickly examined each item as she put it back into her large purse. The woman behind the counter was leaning over it watching to make sure that none of her exotic teas ended up in Keri's eclectic bag.
"Why are you wearing that scarf and those glasses?" Lyn asked.
"I thought it would be good if I was in disguise." Keri said.
"Maybe you and Eric should date. You're not Jewish but you both enjoy trying my patience."
"Oh, that's a low blow. Don't say I remind you of Eric. Please don't. Is she here?"
Lyn stretched her leg over Keri and walked to the back of the store so that she could look into the beautiful garden behind it. It was quite amazing this peaceful and vibrant park within a store. The grass was a beautiful shade of green. The edge of the cobblestone walk was lined with bonsai trees. The stone tables were topped with marble and what looked like jade. Intricate statues of buddha dotted the lawn. And Becky sat with Lola at one of the tables. They both were sitting on the bench in the lotus position attempting to center themselves but because both had amply 'improved' themselves with plastic surgery every few seconds or so they would start to drift to the left or the right nearly tumbling over. They were a little top heavy. The scene reminded Lyn of the Rainbow Brite doll she had when she was young. She could never get it to sit up and lord over her Care Bears as it was meant to do.
Keri stumbled up the stairs and bumped into Lyn again.
"Keri, you're going to be the death of me today. Take off that stupid disguise."
Keri reluctantly removed the scarf but she refused to take off the glasses. Lyn shook her head at her again before grabbing her by the elbow and walking her into the garden. They slid onto the bench in front of Becky and Lola. Becky and Lola didn't notice. Their eyes were closed and they were loudly chanting "Om."
Keri clapped her hands and said, "Look, Kurt Cobain!"
Becky and Lola nearly tumbled over as their eyes opened and they scanned the garden.
Keri chuckled softly and gave them a wry smile, "Ha ha ha. Gotcha girls. You do know Kurt's dead right? Its been a while."
While adjusting on the bench, Becky replied, "The soul of music lives forever. Kurt could appear, right Lola?" Lola nodded. "He's like the patron saint of our generation."
"Listen, while I'm sure Smells Like Teen Spirit endeared Mr. Cobain to the Big Guy in the sky, Becky, we're here because I have some bad news for you," Lyn said. She pulled the pictures from her jacket pocket. "I need you to take a look at these, Becky. I warn you though, they might be disturbing."
Becky examined the pictures while Lola looked over her shoulder. They both gasped louder and louder with each successive image. Lyn went through the order of the pics in her head.
- Eric with the bloody nose.
- Eric with the bloody nose and the black eye.
- Eric on all fours attempting to crawl away with a workman's boot creeping into the bottom of the frame as if he was being kicked in the ass (ass-kicking courtesy of Lyn)
- Eric laying 'unconscious' by the railroad tracks
- Eric laying 'unconscious' by the railroad tracks with the command "PAY UP OR GET OUT OF TOWN ROCK STAR!" scrawled on his white wifebeater t-shirt in black sharpie. (he insisted that they use the term 'rock star.' He claimed it was more realistic. Whatever.)
Becky looked up, tears streaming down her cheeks, "Is he...d-d-d-dead?"
Lyn shook her hands in front of her, "No no no. But you saw what they wrote on his chest...he didn't have the money, so he got out of town never to return again."
"Really? But what about the band? Starfucker needs him. Los Angeles needs him. I need him...and more importantly, rock music needs him."
Lyn sighed loudly and looked towards the sky, "Oh I'm sure he will be a Rock & Roll god where ever he ends up."
"Where'd he go? I'm going with him. He needs me."
As Lyn explained that Eric had gone to parts unknown and that no one was going to hear from him again, Keri's cell phone went off. She got up from the bench and slowly walked toward the exit.
Hey...Yeah, I think they bought it...Come on, you've talked to them...They're both dumb as dirt...I had a really cool disguise but Lyn made me take it off...I know, she's a spoil sport. Anyways, I'll see you in couple hours for dinner, Eric. Smooches
Becky wiped away the tears from her eyes and started to breathe heavily. Lyn turned towards Keri and gave her the dirtiest glare. Keri gave the 'Oops! I did it Again' shrug and then pointed back towards Becky whose face had gone a dark red. She was breathing so hard, her lip was curling into a snarl.
"Lola, I knew it! This bitch is trying to steal my man! She wants Eric for herself! We need to beat her down. Hand me my shoes!" Lola and Becky came at Lyn with stiletto heels in hand. The shoes were hell to walk in but were even deadlier as weapons. Lyn backed away from the women and asked, "Hey, can't we work this out?"
As soon as those words were out of her mouth, Flower jumped out from behind a tree in the garden and tackled Lola to the ground. Becky lunged towards Lyn but Lyn quickly side stepped her, spinning and elbowing her in the back. She grabbed her by the wrist and twisted her behind her back. Flower sat on top of Lola's back rendering her helpless. Keri had pulled her camera from her bag and taken pictures of the entire thing.
Lyn pulled Becky up by her hair and said, "Listen, Becky. Eric was trying to save you the heartache but you had to go and try to shoe me to death so here's the deal. Its over. Eric's done with the trashy ho cakes. That means you and your little ho-in-training over there. He's looking for a nice girl. Give it up. Do you understand? Grunt twice for yes." Becky did.
"Hey Keri, can you bring over the consolation prize?" Keri walked over and pushed a polaroid in front of Becky's face. Lyn explained, "Now, despite the fact that you tried to kill me with your Drunken Slut fighting style, I'm going to help you out. I'm giving like that. This guy in the picture...he's a rock star, sort of. He sings in a band. I think that's pretty much all that matters to you, right?" Becky grunted twice. "His number is on the picture as well as the date of his next gig. Get there early, they only play about 4 songs. Tell him you love him in his leather pants. He'll be yours. Trust me."
Lyn let Becky go. Keri handed her the picture and Flower got off of Lola. The three women straightened out their clothes and exited the garden. Lyndsay stopped at the tea counter and asked for a nice relaxing beverage.
The counter lady said, "I can't serve you...Bad chi. You have bad chi."
Lyn replied, "Yeah, maybe so, but I'm a Rock Detective. I think that's the only way it works."