She + Me Situation

"Feelin' the changes inside this ecstasy...just you and me." - Jazzanova, Rockin' You Eternally

If I'm really honest, I've known I was going to be with Tiffany for the long haul since New Year's 2009. That was her first time meeting my family and she was an instant hit. My sister took a quick liking while my mother preceded to talk her ear off. They connected over a mutual fascination with exotic and worldly meals, a love of travel, and a good drink. She even held court with my father, discussing the merits of Krystal's Burgers and White Castle.

And, as we sat on the love seat in my parents' family room, I knew that she had, in a few short hours, become part of mine.

I thought about asking her soon after. I even bought a kitschy ring from poketo in case the spirit moved me that Valentine's day or anytime after. I didn't do it. On my trip to Atlanta that February, the $10 sign of my commitment sat in my bag. And it would sit trip after trip until, eventually, it stopped traveling with me. It was increasingly apparent to me that this couldn't be some cavalier thing, no matter how nervous tradition, pomp & circumstance tend to make me.

We had a fight in April of 2009. Well, not really a fight. We'd just come off of two amazing trips. Our first as a couple at SXSW and then our first trip together to New Orleans. New Orleans had been particularly spectacular. Something about that trip and that city crystallized in my head what our life together could be like. We always have a great time together but NOLA was particularly special. But, long distance relationships are hard in that, a weekend of bliss can quickly be followed with a week of missed connections at a time when you're trying to hold on to a feeling.

Those missed connections that week mixed with some bad juju from a relationship between friends that had gone south turned into our first heated conversation. Details are unnecessary but after we reconciled, I realized how much she mattered to me. How much I was willing to fight for this relationship. How honest with her and, more importantly, with myself, I was willing to be. And it was at that time that I started planning in earnest.

Some things had to happen first -- Meet her parents and determine whether or not her fam was too crazy for me; if not, inform them of my intentions; then, get her her ideal ring and ask for her hand. It took a good 8 months for all that to happen but a week and a half ago it all came together.

There were two ideas that immediately came about how to do it -- I could arrive in Atlanta unannounced and surprise her at work or at home or I could do it at the airport when she arrived for one of her trips West. That seemed particularly brilliant to me as our romantic relationship began with her flying to LA about 18 months ago.

So, Valentine's Day weekend that's what I set out to do. I arrived at LAX early only to find that her plane had landed early as well. I had no time to prepare as she was coming down the escalator mere moments after I'd entered terminal 5. After a hug and a kiss, I took her bag and asked about her flight. She proceeded to inform me about the perils of the middle seat and the annoying kid and as she did, I brought out the little black box from my pocket.

It took her a second to recognize what it was and then another half a second to say, "You're not going to do this here."

I said, "I am," and attempted to go down on my knee. Her face turned from bewilderment to complete terror.

She grabbed my elbow and prevented me from going down. "No, no no no. Not here. You can't do it here," she pleaded.

"Are you for real," I asked realizing as I did that she was dead serious. She looked like a frightened rabbit and that at any moment she might sprint back up the escalator and hop on the first plane back to Georgia.

I relented on the knee action but then tried to show her the ring. She stopped me. "So...Yes," she said, "But wait."

I said, "Okay," placed the ring back in my pocket, hauled her bag onto one shoulder, took her hand, and we laughed all the way home.

It wasn't until we stepped into my apartment that I was able to finish the deed. I finally got to me knee and asked, barely audibly, "Will you marry me?" As I did, I opened the box. I don't even know if she actually heard the question as she saw the ring and began to well up.

Her eyes danced. We embraced. I placed the ring on her finger...only to find that it was two sizes too big.

And that, for the many people who have asked, is the true story of our engagement. Honestly, though, it's better when she tells it in person.

Shorter, too.

Resized, like my plan and like the ring.