Jason Toney

How I Got Over: My Favorite Albums of 2010

"Let me be your everlasting light." - The Black Keys, Everlasting Light

I don't know that there was a broad theme for my music listening habits in 2010. I found a lot of hip-hop I liked again after 2009 where I liked very little. I tended towards soulful records (whether neo, retro, bluesy, classic, or avant-garde). I loved adventurous spirits. I embraced the concept of "free" releases fully and gave them equal footing with paid for albums. I collected almost entirely digitally (amazonmp3.com is awesome. and evil. eMusic is getting better with age). I fell back in love with composed, instrumental, mostly soundtrack music. And I saw a whole lot more music live which I hope continues into the new year.

But, instead of giving you a list, I give you some anecdotes.

The Album That Most Represents 2010: My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy
I have to take all of Kanye's output as a whole. Combined with the G.O.O.D. Friday releases It's over 20 songs of excess with wide ranging topics that display his own egoism, confusion, candor, bluster, and frustration. Ain't that America in 2010 for sure? West, of course, stamps his unique musical genius and lyrical wit and humor on it and brings along some of the most interesting artists in the business to collaborate with him. I don't know that I can pick a favorite track from this album but All Of The Lights from the formal release and Lord Lord Lord from the G.O.O.D. freebies stay top of mind. Shout-out for getting me to appreciate Justin Bieber, too, with Runaway Love.

The Album That Most Represents Who I Am in 2010: How I Got Over
I wrote a bit about this album in July. Back then I said:

Like De La Soul's The Grind Date stood out for me as reflective of a moment in time in my life, such is the same with How I Got Over. Hip Hop can grow as I grow. Belee Dat.

That still holds true. It's nice to see hip hop mature while remaining fresh and interesting and relevant. And, personally, I felt like I really got over this year, truly beginning my life as an adul in big ways. Hell, I'm writing this from my fiance's house as we inch ever closer to our shared life together. We're doin' it (again). That, of course, is my stand-out track.

The Album That Everybody Everywhere Will and Should Love: Brothers
There is nothing negative to say about this album. From it's first moments to it's last, it is a kick in the pants. I got to see The Black Keys live this year and they impressed by having even more energy and musical acumen on stage. You've heard a good portion of this album on commercials all year and those moments haven't been annoying. I haven't found that ubiquity to turning those songs into being "played out". It's just good good music. Favorite Track: Howlin' For You.

The Album to Get You To Inbox Zero: Inception
Loved the movie. Might love the soundtrack even more. Battling with email is a daily occurrence for me and using this album (or Hans Zimmer's and Christopher Nolan's other recent collaboration - The Dark Knight Soundtrack) to get me through it has become standard. I don't have explanation for why. It just puts my mind in the right space. Time loses form. The world pulls away. It's just me and your damn delivered missives and I'm chopping them down. Favorite Track: 528491.

The Album For Sunday Morning Brunch or Your Fancy Dinner Party: BlackMagic
I didn't know anything about José James until one of my trips to Atlanta in the last year. After brunch with J. and Karsh and Brandon, we made our way to Moods Music where J. gave a nod to him as worth my time. He's so right. This release is luscious. It fills you up. It makes me feel better about myself and the world. Favorite Track: Code.

The Album That's Way More Awesome Than I Would've Ever Thought: Culdesac
Childish Gambino is Donald Glover (Troy from Community). His free mixtape is ridiculous. His live show was ridiculous. He's got way more talent than should be allowed. I'm impressed. Favorite Track: The Difference, although the Adele sampling Do Ya Like is a strong contendor.

The Album(s) That Reminds Me Why I Love Los Angeles: Love Pts. 1 and 2
Build an Ark is a local collective. They make big music. They make lovely hippie style community music. They make me proud to be from LA. Favorite Track? Pshaw, get both full lenghts and support great music and great people.

Other albums of note:

• New Amerykah Part II: Return of The Ankh by Erykah Badu
• Authenticity by The Foreign Exchange
• Contra by Vampire Weekend
• Teflon Don by Rick Ross
• Good Things by Aloe Blacc

5 for 10: My Favorite Songs of the Year

"Tell me what you want from me." - Erykah Badu, Window Seat

Taking inspiration from The Current's 5 for 2010 post, here's my own list, taken directly from my last.fm data (with a few liberties*).

1. Window Seat by Erykah Badu
I'm not sure if this is my favorite song of the year but this was clearly the first song of the year that I was obsessed with. The video, the faux controversy of that video, and the fact that this is just a bomb ass soul track with an ill breakdown put this on repeat during several weekends in March and April. And, as someone who spent most of the first half of this year on airplanes (always in the window seat), the metaphors on this track really spoke to me.

2. Just Ain't Gonna Work Out by Mayer Hawthorne
Mayer's A Strange Arrangement was one of my favorite albums of 2009 and his music, along with the retro soul movement he's a part of, was a dominant force in my earbuds this year. Just Ain't Gonna Work Out, for whatever reason, tended to be where I stopped first when it was time to dig in with Mr. Hawthorne. I hadn't realized on initial listens that most of the songs on A Strange Arrangement are break up songs but they are. And they are great break up songs. Particularly this one which grooves hard while moving on.

3. Doin' It Again by The Roots
While I think Kanye West's lastest has surpassed How I Got Over as my favorite album of the year, this track rivals his Power as the wake up, work out, take over anthem of the year. This gets me amped. I want to box anybody or anything that stands in my way. Let's Go!

4. Islands by The xx
The xx's debut release showed up in my collection late in 2009 so, of course, their award winning indie-soul sound dominated the first part of 2010. This track, of which I have way too many remixes, just gets my mind right. I don't know why. I've never even parsed the lyrics to really understand twhat the song is about. I just love the melodies and the muted tones and the groove. It makes me want to lay back, drink in hand, with my arm around my lady.

5. Cousins by Vampire Weekend
Contra was the only new release in the early part of the year that I found interesting. Cousins is a great example of why. It's fun and expansive and bouncy. It was a wonderful counterpart to the serious shit happening in my life during that time. Let's jump around. Let's have a party. Let's forget about all our worries. Me and your cousins and you and your cousins. I can feel it coming.

*I decided that artists could only appear once on the list. Otherwise, we'd just be talking a whole lot about The Roots.

Lesson Learned #reverb10

"When I opened my eyes it was all in front of me." - Sharon Jones & The Dap Kings, I Learned The Hard Way

December 17 – Lesson Learned
What was the best thing you learned about yourself this past year? And how will you apply that lesson going forward?
(Author: Tara Weaver)

I learned that I'm not as good as reading other people's cues as I like to think I am. I learned not assume that people walk through the world and process situations the same way I do and that it's important for me to recognize when those divergent view points are leading towards conflict.

I've learned to listen more. Really listen. To try my best to not have an opinion or an assumed answer when I ask a question.

Going forward, the goal is to not try to win every conversation. This is hard. I'm very much a "Saunders" in this regard. My mother and a couple of her siblings and my grandfather all are or were prone to argue famously. We like it. We tend to not take heated debate personally even when the words get harsh or too real. They are all quick witted and learned and convinced they are right even when they are so wrong.

I'm just like them.

That leads to great fun and entertainment when we're around each other or other like-minded folks. For others, though, trying to debate with me is prone to get your feelings hurt even when that's not my intent.

I just want to win.

I'm just convinced I'm right. Even when I'm wrong, I'm right.

And I like the art and spirit of debate. It's like a great workout for my brain.

But I don't mean to hurt your feelers.

And everything isn't a debate.

So in 2011, I'm going to try my damnedest to understand when something is just a conversation and not a debate and I'll shut up more often and be open to alternate theories and approaches to life.

Unless you're just totally wrong.

I just can't cotton to wrongheadedness. And I will need to tell you about yourself.

Sigh.

#ITSAPROCESS

Friendship #reverb10

"Your real friends won't do you wrong." - Nas and Damian Marley, Friends

December 16 – Friendship
How has a friend changed you or your perspective on the world this year? Was this change gradual, or a sudden burst?
(Author: Martha Mihalick)

In my world, these days, family and friends munge together so I'm going to not follow the rules and talk about two people. Their names both start with the same letter, though, so maybe that counts.

Derrick (perhaps better known as geekandahalf) was an inspiration. He made a declaration at the beginning of the year and his steady focus on that goal and making the changes he wanted in his life was awe inducing. His embracing of hope and possibility in the face of ridiculous upheaval, with disappointment lurking behind every corner, reminded me that, when in doubt, go big. D-nice spent 2010 living big, loving big, and living out loud. I'm of the opinion we only get one shot at this life thing so why live it any other way?

Dominique, my sister, moved back to New York City just a little over a year ago and has never looked back. She's had the quintessential struggling actress life in the city, with multiple places to live, multiple jobs, and all the challenges that come with being young, broke, black and fabulous in the Big Apple. Through it all, though, she's grown and learned and adapted. And won! She's performed on stage regularly. She did her first commercial. She's gone viral. She's performed in foreign lands. She's doing the damn thing. From her I am always reminded, trust your gut, follow your heart, take risks, and take no shorts. This is the Team Toney way and Dominique lived it to the fullest in 2010.

Love y'all.

5 Minutes #reverb10

"I want somebody to speed it up for me and then take it down slow." - Madonna, 4 Minutes

December 15 – 5 Minutes
Imagine you will completely lose your memory of 2010 in five minutes. Set an alarm for five minutes and capture the things you most want to remember about 2010.
(Author: Patti Digh)

• Tiffany's face when I attempted to propose to her in the airport
• The queasiness in my stomach and the quiet in my voice when I got down on my knee in my apartment and asked
• The pain in my back after working on houses
• The giant cherry on a spoon in Minneapolis
• Driving around New Orleans with Derrick as he told me about "His City"
• Toasting the launch of the new home page on Disney.com
• Watching my sister show us her Abraham Lincoln
• Attending the Church of Love and Happiness with Melle and Anna
• The dance circle at The Black Keys
• Getting chased by pre-school age shark at The Taste of Beverly Hills
• Melle's face when J. walked through the door at Herbsaint
• Derrick's explanation of what he thought when he walked in the restaurant..."Who that Black?"
• Felicia's face at her first bite of food at August
• That I didn't want for much
• That I flew more than I've ever flown in my life
• That the challenges I had were always surmountable
• That my friends are the business
• That my family always surprises
• That Tiffany is forever my lady

*5 minutes goes quickly.

Appreciate #reverb10

"Ooooh, I wanna thank you." - Antony and the Johnsons, Thank You For Your Love

December 14 – Appreciate
What’s the one thing you have come to appreciate most in the past year? How do you express gratitude for it?
(Author: Victoria Klein)

This is a bit ironic since Wii Fit has been telling me regularly that I have very little of it (except when I'm standing still) but the answer is: balance. I know change is a constant but this last year has felt especially prone to blindside right hooks and unexpected turns. I'm not prone to feeling frazzled but I was shook a bit more often than I'm used to over these 12 months.

So, I've appreciated those days were things felt, if not in sync, at least in balance. And I've appreciated when I've been deliberate in getting back to center. Sometimes that meant ritualizing my mornings so I could quiet my mind but sometimes that's also meant finding great reasons to leave the house, hear some live music, shake my moneymaker, and balancing working hard with playing hard.

I appreciate the balance The Lady brings to my life. As we get closer by the day to officially co-habitating, I have been reflecting on what life was like the week she spent in LA Thanksgiving week. Sharing meals together, going on walks together, decompressing by being able to talk through my day with her...I felt the power of partnership.

And balance.

I don't know that I take a lot of time to express appreciation besides trying to share. Whether it's with the words I write here or actually sharing these experiences in real time with my loved ones, I hope whomever or whatever cares about such things besides me knows that I don't take this life for granted especially the moments in which I've got both the yin and the yangs. Those moments when I am without want. Those moments when my soul is at peace.

Thanks.

Action #reverb10

"The consequences." - Phoenix, I'm An Actor

December 13 – Action
When it comes to aspirations, it’s not about ideas. It’s about making ideas happen. What’s your next step?
(Author: Scott Belsky)

To answer this means I have to define some goals to actually act upon, right? Being "Body Integrated", no matter how much I find that term lacking, is one of them but I just wrote about that. There's getting married and getting started on the next chapter of our lives with Tiffany but that part of my life is full of momentum right now and I feel like we've talked that to death.

So what is it that I want to do next? What am I aspiring to be?

I don't know.

Well, that's not true. I have some big goals and ideas professionally. I want to put my team in a position to tell the best stories possible in our digital medium. I have a lot to do to get there but most of that isn't for the blog until after it happens (if it finds a place here at all).

But, personally, I'm not as inspired. Tiffany and I have talked about a new site concept for awhile but I don't know that I'm motivated by that yet. My interest in it usually comes out of anger and frustration by what someone else has done or written but not necessarily by my own desire to write about those topics on a regular basis. I'm not sure that's a recipe for a successful new web venture (even if that measure of success is just to have a fun hobby).

So, I don't know what the big ideas are for me in a personal sense, right now, and I'm okay with that. Good big ideas aren't every day things.

So, in figuring out the next steps, I first need to figure out where it is I actually want to go. Maybe this reverb stuff will help that process.

Body Integration #reverb10

"I want to live where soul meets body." - Death Cab For Cutie, Soul Meets Body

December 12 – Body Integration
This year, when did you feel the most integrated with your body? Did you have a moment where there wasn’t mind and body, but simply a cohesive YOU, alive and present?
(Author: Patrick Reynolds)

I was going to skip this one but Erica wrote something thoughtful about the benefits of yoga and Tiffany's response was short but brutally honest and together that gave me some inspiration.

Like Tiffany, I don't think I achieved much, if any at all, mind/body synergy this year. I had that on the regular for about 4 months in 2009, though. From mid june until about Thanksgiving I was deliberate with my intentions about taking care of both my mental and physical health. I was eating right. I was doing yoga. I was working out consistently. I lost nearly 30 pounds.

Then I started feeling myself. Then the holidays came. Then some heavy shit went down right at the turn of the year. And, then, wow, I was off the wagon.

I stress eat. Always have. I was stress eating like a mug during the first part of 2010. I was still working out relatively consistently but food choices are way more important for my physical health than anything else and the veggies disappeared.

This is actually more common than that other scenario from 2009. I either am eating right or I am working out. Rarely can I get my ish together to do both at the same time.

That's a goal for the 2011. I'm hoping that co-habitation leads to better habits for both of us and not to us becoming bumps on a log. My commitment to that is to keep us motivated and exercising. I got a sobering reminder of that tonight when Wii Fit told me I was a fat fat fatty with bad balance, a stiff right leg, and weak arms. I'll beat you Wii Fit. Damnit.

The third prong on this Body Integration (I kind of hate this phrase) bit is something I have tried to do daily in the last third of this year -- regular meditation, focus, and centering. I've been lax in following through on this lately as well.

I need a return to the morning rituals. To breaking down the big things into attackable portions.

And, to doing all of these things at the same time.

In 2011, I want to maximize what I can do by taking advantage of the whole me. That's about a settled mind, a strong body, and a stomach full on leafy greens instead of greasy things.

Maybe the next synergy product I should develop and enhance is staring me in the mirror.

 

Wisdom #reverb10

"Yo, I love your outline, boo." - Ghostface on Raekwon's, Wisdom Body

December 10 – Wisdom
Wisdom. What was the wisest decision you made this year, and how did it play out?
(Author: Susannah Conway)

The wisest decision I made this year was to ask for help when I needed it. In my professional life, I'm pretty collaborative. I don't mind sharing tasks and responsibility and happily give credit to those who help us achieve our mutual goals.

At home, though? In my personal life, I've tended towards doing it all myself. My problems are my problems and I handle them on my own. The idea of burdening someone else with my issues, no matter how real or serious they are, has always constrained me from sharing that part of my life.

The problem has never been about worrying who was gonna take the weight. I've always known I've had the right kind of people in my life who would. I, however, didn't want to tarnish their view of me or of how I saw myself.

I like swooping in like your knight in shining armor. I like being thought of as a go-to person when the going gets tough. I like problem solving for everybody else. It gives me great joy to be able to do that for others, whether they are my nearest and dearest or strangers.

This year, though, I realized how selfish that was of me. Why would I deny the opportunity for my friends and family to reciprocate that when I really needed it and maybe get some of that same feeling?

And, also, I really needed help this year. This grown up business can be messy and I faced a few scenarios that I didn't know quite how to handle. And instead of bottling it up or attempting to cryptically write about it, I reached out. An IM or an email or a text was always met with a friendly ear or three.

My people were at the ready. They helped me talk through things or just joined me for a drink and a laugh or a soul affirming meal or sprung into action to help me push whatever giant boulder I was struggling with to the finish line.

So, my wisest decision was trusting in the wisdom of the crowd.

My crowd.

Thanks y'all.

 

Let Go #reverb10

"Leave your things behind because it's all going off without you." - Frou Frou, Let Go

December 5 – Let Go.
What (or whom) did you let go of this year? Why?
(Author: Alice Bradley)

"It's alright because there's beauty in the breakdown."

I let go of my younger self this year. I won't go back into it in detail since I have already written about it but I made peace with being a grown up. I've let go of whatever youthful dreams I had about life and replaced them with more mature ones.

This isn't a bad thing. I'm soon to be one of The Marrieds. If my family history is any indication, I'm halfway to dying. I have a much more acute sense of the passage of time and there's still a whole helluva lot I want to do in this life.

But I also have a new found appreciation for being responsible to others as well as myself. To the obligations I'm choosing for myself. To the partnerships and commitments and beliefs I hold.

And that creates new dreams. A dream of a healthy and fruitful life. Dreams of supporting and sharing with another. Dreams of being the man others imagine I am.

And to do less dreaming and more doing.

I've let go of the idea that I'll always have time. It's time to take advantage of those infinite possibilities before I get gone.

Let's Go!