Jason Toney

through the wire, through the fire, to the limit

"In the same hospital where biggie smalls died/doctor said I had blood clots but I ain't jamaican man/story on MTV and I ain't trying to make the band" - Kanye West, Through the Wire (College Dropout) A 26 mile training run. Up at 4 AM. In Griffith Park in the dark at 6. Starting Mile 1 at 8 AM. Finishing mile 26 on a busted foot tendon at 3:30pm. Rocking the shakes, the numbness in the extremities, the lack of motor control in my legs, the silly post run grin, the grimace with every step, the thirst, the hunger, the desperation, the euphoria. And the motherfucking medal. Training is over. 29 days to the AIDS Marathon in Honolulu. I'm ready to run my face off. What did you do on Saturday?

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itunes is an addiction. I made my first song purchases today. That Kanye West track up there, and the Chaka Khan track it samples. Steppin into Tomorrow and Think Twice from Donald Byrd's Stepping Into Tomorrow Album. So, my "favorite songs this week" playlist looks like this - 1. Steppin into Tomorrow - Donald Byrd, Stepping Into Tomorrow 2. Steppin into Tomorrow - Madlib, Shades of Blue 3. Think Twice - Jay Dee, Welcome 2 Detroit 4. Think Twice - Erykah Badu featuring Roy Hargrove, Worldwide Underground 5. Think Twice - Donald Byrd, Stepping Into Tomorrow 6. Truth N Time - Al Green, AnotherLateNight (Groove Armada) 7. Don't Stop What You're Doin - Alicia Myers, Badmeaninggood, Vol. 3 8. Get By - Talib Kweli, Quality 9. Through The Wire - Kanye West, College Dropout 10. Through The Fire - Chaka Khan, I Feel For You I'm tempted to buy so much more right now. Current Digital Music Revolution Numbers? 303 Albums 1162 Artists 25 Genres 4434 Songs 12.5 Days of Music 16.92 Gigabytes

Happy Ending

"slow down, my love, you're confusing me" - Dido, Do You Have a Little Time (Life For Rent) I was prone on her table with a small pillow covering my eyes to block out the sun and fill my nose with the aroma of jasmine. She pushed the hem of my shorts further up my leg and then slid her fingers under the snug fit of my UnderArmor and slowly rolled it back a few times so that I was all the more exposed. Her hands were strong and deliberate and moved along my body without fear. The fear was all in my head. As she worked the muscles in my pelvic bone and then worked her way down my torso, sometimes straddling me, sometimes pulling on me in ways that made me want to yelp all I could think of was suppression. Please, God or whatever higher power is out there if there is really one, because, you know, I have doubts, but that's for another conversation, at this moment I'm putting my trust in you, my invisible friend in the sky, please don't let my body react that way right now. Please don't let me get...

H2Oh No!

"Yo, I'm steady at it, these deadly habits." - Gang Starr, Deadly Habitz (The Ownerz) So, yeah, I nearly died yesterday. Too much salt on Friday mixed with me adding some new gear to my running uniform sprinkled with my forgetting my packet of gatorade mix and swallowed with way too much water led to a mild case of hyponatremia.

hitting a wall made of rice

"Jus 1 kill will make it better." - Basement Jaxx, Jus 1 Kiss (Rooty) 12 miles is a lot of damn miles. 3 hours is a hell of a long time to be running. It's hot by the beach at 10 am. The first 2 miles of every run always suck. Having to wait 4 minutes for people on a bathroom break on the 4th mile will fuck with your body. Going up hills for a quarter to a half mile are not difficult for me. Going down them is. Sadly, hearing Ignition booming out of car during the 8th and 9th miles put me in the zone and I ran those the best. I hit the wall sometime during the 11th mile. I rolled my ankle right at the start of the 12th mile. Ouch.

runnin' for somethin, runnin' from nothin'

"How could I be so immature?" - Björk, Immature (Homogenic) Each week we're running for somebody or some thing. CAP came up to me before she was going to make announcements and said she was going to read off who I was running for but that she was going to hold one because somebody else is running for him and we might have a special guest to commemorate that. I was feeling like it was going to be a bad run prior to that as 8 miles is no joke. We were going from Santa Monica to the Marina proper and back again in an hour and fifty two minutes. But then CAP stood in front of our run group and said, "Today's people that we're running for was suggested by Jason and so we're running for EJ and Donald who are both living with the disease and for all those who support those with HIV and AIDS on a daily basis and, thus, are also living with the disease, so we're also running for Mike and the rest of the boys of the D.I.C. and don't ask Jason what D.I.C. stands for because he still doesn't know." So I decided to have a good run. I did. The calves are screaming though. And This is Not a Remix - You can still support me and this marathon thang and AIDS Project Los Angeles by clicking right here.

sawed off shotgun

"Talk about beautiful things a little bit" - Bahamadia, Beautiful Things (BB Queen) If I cut my right leg off at the knee would that be a bad thing?

3 & a 1/2 hours, 4 miles, 3 minutes too fast

"My mama always told me don't take no shit." - Clipse, Young Boy (Lord Willin') Counselor-at-law is an interesting play with some quick witted and interesting dialogue, although not the most compelling of plots (at least in their rendition). It is also the longest damn play ever. 3 and a 1/2 hours on a Friday Night? Come on now. I started dreaming about Mojitos and maybe a little french toast from The Standard. The company was pleasant though. The Actress had CK tagging along and she's mad funny. Which is probably why she's dating The Comedian. She's like me...always looking for the right set-up to hit a line out the park. Last night she struck gold with "Life Force" (which included a hand motion). I fell flat with my Elmer Rice/Elmer Fudd joke but I think i made up for it with some other riffs on life force. Damn, I need new material. And a Mojito. Material and Mojitos. Yes.

only a babillion miles to go

"Just take me to the backseat, where no one else can see." - The Donnas, Take Me to the Backseat (Spend the Night) At 5am, I was up. I pretended like I wasn't up. I kept my eyes closed and tossed and turned in bed as if I was sleeping but I was up. At 6:20am, I was getting gas. On a Saturday. 6:20am. Wow, it's early. I was surprised by how many people were out and about before 7am on the weekend. 7am. Heh, at 7am, I was walking down the steps into the outdoor auditorium of Santa Monica High School as Cool Ass Photographer yelled my name. You remember C.A.P. right? Yeah, she's my marathon coach in an effort to remind me again how small a world L.A. is. At 7:22am, I was running down Pico boulevard towards the beach. Passed by Shutters and considered hanging a right right into the restaurant and ordering up some vanilla flavored waffles. Considered long and hard about it. Even as I ran past and onto the boardwalk I was thinking about those waffles. I ran for about 6 minutes straight which was a bad idea. Just like Marathon explains, you should take your walk breaks often and early. I took them a lot more often late and wasn't getting as big a benefit from them, although I took the incline back up Pico from the beach really well. At 7:58am, I made it back to Santa Monica High School having run 3 12 minute miles. I opted to go in a slower pace group, though, for a few reasons: 1) I don't think I can maintain that pace over longer runs yet and 2) the 12 minute mile group is filled with a lot of A-type personalities that I think would get on my damn nerves and 3) the 14 minute mile group is a lot smaller and filled with cool chicks and me. That's so my regular scene.

supernova

"I say the beat don't stop" - Peanut Butter Wolf, Conducted Rhythms (Jukebox 45s) You should probably read 26.2 miles first. Asher asked me to walk away from him with my shoes off and my pants rolled up. "Don't look at me," he commanded and I stood up a little more straight, scared to turn my head. "What can you tell me about your foot," he asked. "I wear a ten and a half or a ten depending on the shoe," I said. "You're an 11 because your right foot is longer than your left," he stated. "And, your right foot is very flat. You need cushion. I have the shoe!" And he did: the Adidas Supernova Cushion M. Oh my goodness, they feel so good. I like shoes but I don't spend a lot of money. Some choice purchases at Payless, the Skechers outlet and a sale at foot locker and usually I'm straight. My newest pair of shoes are really light, if not entirely comfortable, Nike Prestos and they were a gift from my mom. The Adidas Supernova though? The finest feeling under me. I felt so quick in them and solid and my back screamed with delight a little as it realigned. I wore them through Tae bo and then for the rest of the night. I should have probably worn them today but I need at least 2 more pair for all that. And, this is important because running shoes are usually horrendous, they aren't ugly! No orange and yellow and bright blue all up in there. A nice, sleek, white shoe with gray and black accents. I can find matching gear for that. So, yay for Asher and Shoe Wearhouse. And 10% off so that I could buy a few pairs of 10 dollar socks. Other news. Some folks are awesome with their generosity and support of me and this cause. I'm honored and amazed by all of you. Especially you. Your words of encouragement and support will be in my head on those tough miles. Fo'rilla.

26.2 miles

"This world is full of love, we still have hope." - Zero 7, This World (Simple Things) From my apartment in Canoga Park, California to the exit for Los Angeles International Airport is 23.5 miles. On December 14th of this year, I will run that distance plus 2.7 more miles. 26.2 miles. In my head it seemed impossible when I decided I was going to take this on about a month ago. It still seems incredibly daunting, a feat that I would have never imagined attempting 3 years ago or 3 months ago. The reason I'm running this marathon? Because I'm raising money for AIDS Project Los Angeles. APLA is the leading provider of AIDS services for Southern California. When I raise $3,000, APLA will fly me to Honolulu Hawaii, put me up in a hotel for the weekend and wish me luck. Then I will run 26.2 miles. I'm not a runner. I don't jog. I've never even really enjoyed the activity but I'm doing this. Why? Because the only reason the shows I work for have any cultural merit is because a young man died from AIDS complications but spent much of his last year with our cameras in his face. I'm doing this because Magic Johnson is living with the disease and not only living with it but thriving. I'm doing this because I know people living with the disease that aren't thriving. They are struggling. I don't want them to struggle anymore than they have to. I'm also doing this for me. Accomplishment, discipline, focus, pushing myself to the limit. All of it. I have a tendency to shy away from challenges. I have a tendency to succumb to fear. I'm giving that outlook on life a holiday. And quite simply, I have two legs, my health, and my life. There are many who do not, so why wouldn't I do this? But I would like your help. My fund raising goal is $5,000. Which seems like a crazy goal but if I get 200 people to donate a dollar a mile (26 dollars), APLA would have $4200.00, those dealing with HIV and AIDS in Los Angeles would have some serious assistance, and I would just have 26.2 miles to complete to honor your belief in me. What do ya say? You can make a donation right here on my AIDS Marathon Fundraising page. If you do so by September 3rd, I will promote any link you want right here on this site until I've completed the marathon. And you will have my undying gratitude. And, I'm sure, the gratitude of lots of others who won't know your or my name.